Monday, July 8, 2013

Finding Balance

I'd like to consider myself a very goal-oriented person. Once I have my sights set on accomplishing something, there is very little chance that it won't get done.

But at what expense?

So obviously, I'm in a bit of a rut/rough patch right now. So what am I really talking about? Well, here is how I see things right now.

  • Remember that whole - "50 in 50" goal? Well, obviously, I crushed that goal. Only took 2.5 years!
    • All that time I spent on the road was time I was NOT spending with A or my boyfriend.
    • All that money I spent on races and travel? NOT being used for "family" things or saving for a rainy day.
  • Run all the races in Colorado?
    • Pretty much see above. Granted, some time was "saved" by not traveling, but I still wasn't focused on anything other than another notch in my half marathon belt. Another medal to hang on my medal rack.
  • Run a 100 miler?
    • Well, I might not have succeeded in actually completing that. However, same thing. All that time training was not time I was spending at home.
  • Run a marathon on all the continents?
    • Another goal not quite completed, and I certainly don't regret any of my travels. However, I probably could have/should have been using some of that money to do some nice "family" trips. However, I didn't.
  • Run all the miles all the time.
    • See above.
So what's my point?

Well, I probably don't really have one, other than I have spent a lot of time "reflecting" on  the decisions I have made in the past. I let running control my life. I have spent hours and hours every week planning my training, plotting my next race, figuring out the next "awesome" experience I can have.

It's got to stop. "Luckily" I'm in a financial rut that really isn't allowing me to sign up for anything anyway. But I need to get over my "race envy." I need to get over the "feeling left out" if I am unable to participate in something.

I have met someone AMAZING people through running. But the bottom line is, while I cherish the relationships I have built as a result of my running and racing, it has made my CONCRETE life suffer. You know, REAL life, and I seem to have forgotten what that is all about.

Too little, too late for a lot of changes to really "matter," but I have to step back from this lovely "virtual" world I have built up.

I'm not saying goodbye to the blog, a post here and there, but in general, I'm taking a break. If you are a Twitter/Facebook friend, then you already might be aware that I'm taking a break from that as well.

PS - I'm still about $200 away from my fundraising goal for Dumbo, there is a link on my sidebar, I'd really love a donation if you have a few bucks to spare.

8 comments:

  1. Becka, I'll miss reading all about your race recaps and adventures, but I TOTALLY understand! Take time to take care of yourself and your family! Best wishes!

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  2. Are you interested in pacing a half marathon from a pace group here in Utah. They are coming out Colorado to do a half marathon and need pacers. The facebook page is american flyers pacers. I just added you to their facebook page and you should see if you can have the opportunity. It's free and you still get a shirt and medal.

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  3. Your "running life" is one most of us dream of and will probably never equal. You have accomplished a lot!

    It's ok to take a break from it. There will be plenty races to be run in the future. Just don't miss out on your real life. You can miss out on a lot of AMAZING moments with the ones you love.

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  4. A will be big soon and not want/need you as much, there will be lots of time to run then. Enjoy the break!

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  5. While I didn't travel on as large of a scale as you, I ran 10 halfs between October 2011 and September 2012 and traveled to San Fran, Portland and Maui to do so. I was really irresponsible in planning all of those trips because it was all done on credit cards. Along with some racing burnout, this year I just realized that I have more things to look forward to then halfs. Finding the love of my life and realizing what we want our future to look like made me realize all that frivolous spending was ridiculous. I haven't run a half since March and frankly haven't run much at all the last few months, but now I'm planning a wedding and we are expecting our first child so my priorities have definitely shifted.

    Best wishes in this new "season" of your life.

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  6. As life goes on we change and sometimes blogging and running is more important than other times. It's ok to take a break. Take it one day at a time and see what you feel like doing and not what you have to do. Enjoy the moment!!

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  7. the breakup for me, made me realize this as well. so did my new job. i just don't have the time to post every day, read blogs every day, etc. I LOVE my social media friends-but i need(ed) to focus on finding some IRL ones to hang out with while newly single. I totally understand. It's just about finding the balance.

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  8. I completely understand I'll look forward to your posts.

    Enjoy yourself!

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I adore comments and I read every single one. Thanks for reading :)

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